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  • Writer's pictureDillon Dhanecha

A Match Made in Money

If you've ever disagreed with your life or business partner about money, you'll be pleased to hear that you're not alone

Here's some interesting stats that I've come across over the last few years:

  • Couples who talk about money once a week, report to being happier than those who talk about money less than once a week (TD Bank Love & Money Study 2015)

  • 73% of Millennials talk about money with their partners at least once per week and 36% of millennials reports to fighting about money once a week (TD Bank Love & Money Study 2015; interestingly, another survey showed that Millenials are less likely to divorce)

  • Money Magazine reported in 2014 that 70% of couples argue over money ahead of chores, togetherness, sex, snoring and what's for dinner

  • And the same survey reported that 22% of husbands and wives spent money that they didn't want a partner to know about, with 35% of those dreading getting the money lecture!

  • My old friends at Price Waterhouse Coopers (PwC) report in their annual wellness survey of 2016 that 45% of employees place financial matters as the number one cause of stress: whilst not directly related to money and relationships, I include this stat to highlight that it's never about what you earn and always about how you manage and multiply. Staff at global corporations like PwC are amongst the highest paid employees in the world

Think for a second about if your partner had EXACTLY the same spending, saving and investment habits as you... For the slightest of seconds it may seem like this would be a total match made in heaven but explore a little further and you'll notice that it would be a recipe for total disaster

If the financial security you crave is matched equally by your partner's; where does the fun, excitement and spontaneity come from?

If your partner loves unplanned and unbudgeted spending, which you also love; who in the relationship is going to pull in the reigns and keep a focus on long term wealth creation?

The problem is not rooted in your partner's view of money, nor your view of money; since neither is right or wrong

You may wish you had your partners reckless abandon or crave their total control over money but that is doing an injustice to your own Money Personality

Sure, there are certain things that make "financial sense" in our world fuelled by scarcity and fear AND absolutely there are certain large purchases that need to be planned for BUT all of that can be achieved with wildly differing Money Personalities

As you will have no doubt experienced, trying to force others to think/act/react in the same way as you is futile so if the problem is not the conflict in Money Personalities, what is it?

Fundamentally it is to do with your relationship with money; the paradigms and processes you adhere to that keep you rooted in the fear of not having enough (since, if you had no fear of scarcity, you likely wouldn't give a second thought to what your partner is doing)

Taking a 50,000 ft view of this idea, if you are fearful about not having enough money or stressed about your current financial situation, you'll most certainly be projecting that stress on to your partner' which means that the most important work you have to do is on your relationship with money

As you fundamentally move your relationship with money from one rooted in fear of not having enough to a relationship rooted in total faith that you will always have what it takes to make more money, you begin to "think rich" .... and "thinking rich" is the very first step to becoming rich... more on that in the next post...

Until next time... remember, true prosperity is not about being better than anyone else, but about being better than you used to be...

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